When sex isn’t enough

I’ve been a self proclaimed hoe for years but lately it isn’t enough.

Sex used to heal all kinds of injuries and create new energy, but now it’s a waste.

I was called a hoe at a young age, at the time I think I’d kissed a few different people in a weekend and hoe was assigned to me.

Kissing made me a hoe, so I tried to be the best one I could be. Jumping head first into the pool seemed to be what all the other did. I followed suit.

I started in elementary school and made the realization that I’m queer. Kept plowing my way to college. Along the way I picked up skills & stories of tragedies.

Sex used to be a fun thing I do, now I find myself reserving it for fewer & fewer people I meet.

My random days are going away, even the rare occasion for some “strange” have chipped away.

I need to know my partners on more of a mood way. The vibe game is cool & all but I’m over it.

Seeing past partners used to be like two ships passing in the night (we both were usually lying to each other about our realities) now I’m building towards amicable relations. Lately it’s been snarky text & veiled tweets, but it’s been closure too.

I’ve been a self accepting hoe since college. One of the best things I ever did for me.

Now I’m a different hoe, with different criteria.

Sex isn’t enough on its own, maybe it wasn’t meant to be. I’m gonna try to see what else life can be.

-dreads

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